My Death Experience At Age 12
By Whitneay T. Vanwells

I was a very frail, sickly child, and started having severe asthma attacks at age 3.  While other kids were out playing, I was busy trying to stay alive.  Mom used to say I was playing my "orchestra", as I wheezed with each breath.  This was my childhood.  Me just trying to stay alive.   This was all that I knew. 

At the age of 12, my right lung collapsed, and I was hospitalized. Two weeks later my new doctor, a heart  and lung surgeon,  made surgery  arrangements  to  remove a piece of my right lung. I was  5' 7"  weighed 90 pounds, tall, thin, and I was very frail.   When the new doctor talked to my mother and me about the surgery, I had some bad feelings about it.  I was very ill, scared, and wondered if I had a future.

The day of the surgery arrived, and I was prepped early in the morning with a bath, and a little cinnamon red pill.  I was wheeled into a cold operating room on a smooth riding gurney pushed by a soft spoken black man in a light teal green  uniform.  He was careful not to say much, but I could still comprehend what was going on. 

In the operating room a sarcastic battle worn nurse stood at my side, said 'hello' in a harsh tone, and then made some bad remarks to the others about how thin and sickly I looked.  I was conscious and looking right at her when she said it,  yet she acted as though I wasn't even there.  The man who would give me the anesthesia came in, and again  asked me how much I weighed. Did I care?  By now the little red pill was working, and I am not sure if I spoke.   I could hear him, but not me.  We started to count backwards from 100, or well, he did.

In the middle of the surgery, I died on the operating table.  My heart had stopped for about 10 seconds, they told me later.  My heart had stopped dead, like an old rusty clock that had no more energy to carry on.  Too much anesthesia, and too little weight. 

During the time, that I was "dead"  (which seemed to be about an hour to me) I had an out of body experience.  It was the best thing that had ever happened to me. This was the most beautiful, spiritual experience that you could imagine, and I went to "Heaven".  To have this experience was very matter of fact.  Like you walking across the street, I lifted out of my body, and went some place else.

As I left my cold body on the operating table, I floated high above the table, the nurses and the surgeons.  As I floated in the corner of the operating room, and said in my mind, "Nothing going on here."  In a flash, I went through the ceiling, and found myself  floating out in space among the stars.   I was looking at the earth like a small blue and green soccer ball suspended in mid-air, hanging there by invisible strings.  Again, I said very clearly in my thoughts, "Nothing going on here." Suddenly, my awareness shifted again, and I found myself standing in a beautiful Holy City with soft golden light all around.  The City that I went to, looked something like Bethlehem about 2,000 years ago,  but the Light that beamed gently in this Divine place was soft and serene.  I felt no pain.  I felt no fear.  I was completely at peace, and
content just to Be.  A full sized male lion walked past me as I sat crouched on the warm gold dust sand.  He was only a few feet away from me.  I was not afraid of him.

I paused to think about my position here.  I literally had a choice.  To go back into my physical body, and physical life, or to stay.  I reflected on this for a short time.  I was only 12 years old, and I knew that I had not lived my life.

Then, I stood up and walked down to a river.  To my right, about 20 feet away, I saw a small boy about 10, sitting alone on the river bank.  He was waiting  for someone.  I did not want to disturb him.  I sat down by the waters edge, and put  my right foot into the water.  Suddenly, I felt something pulling on my foot.  And, in a flash, I re-entered my cold body of pain lying face up on the operating table.  My chest was open.  My doctor, above me massaging my heart.

The nasty nurse was to my right, right near my head.  On purpose, I crossed my eyes, and made a grotesque face at her.  When she screamed, I allowed myself to loose consciousness, almost chuckling, if you can believe that.

This event was life altering for me.  At the time that it happened, there was very little information on death experiences.  My mother told me, "Don't tell anyone."  And, that true to form, her advice did not help.  This life hallmark completely changed the course of my life.  And, I would spend the next 20 years trying to make sense of it.  And, trying to find that place again.

I was forever transformed by this beautiful connection to the mystical, Holy Worlds of God.  When I returned to my physical body on the operating table, I knew that my life would never be the same.  I knew that I existed beyond my body and beyond death.  I have the majority of my adult life, trying to re-connect to this gentle, heavenly energy, and the Divine worlds.

And, so I have.

Whitneay T. Vanwells